Teres

So basically, Azhure is pushing herself so hard she's struggling to breathe enough. This is possible, but she should be feeling it in her legs as well.

SCSF: I think that it is meant to be the pain from the broken ribs... but I think "struggling to breathe" is also a large factor. So I will note this!

So, Raum is really good at running despite having holes poked in his legs. Pull another one.

He has also recovered awfully fast from his malnourishment, so I get the impression that Axis recreated his life as well as Shra's without meaning to.

It occurs to me that it'd fit better if Axis thought Raum had mind-controlled Azhure into helping him. But of course he can't be mistaken about anything but whether the Forbidden are demons.

It would make considerably more sense than "Azhure has actually murdered her father", at least.

I'm rather annoyed by GoldFeather asking 'does Artor desire Raum's death' when she ought to know Axis was raised to believe the answer is yes. It's not necessarily a rational feeling, but it is there.

Well, since she has known a previous BattleAxe, she really ought to know that he would say "yes", so I think you are quite justified in complaining.

A lot of life debt stories involve freely given help, so I'm not bothered by Raum thinking he owes Axis.

Yes, that is wholly true. I think I was just bothered that the debt is to Axis of all people.

(Icarii being super-singers now, that I am bothered by. But then I'm a choir girl, so I'm hardly unbiased.)

Then I look forward to seeing what you will have to say about that!