Teres

I would say "better late than never", but given how painful most of this has been, I think "please make it stop" would be more appropriate.

SCSF: Yes, it certainly would be. Unfortunately, it will go on for quite some time; fortunately, more things will keep happening!

It feels like Douglass is trying to make her descriptions sound cool without thinking about whether it makes sense or not.

(nods) Exactly! I think quite a bit of this might work better in a visual medium, but it is not, and the emphasis on striking images simply does not fit here.

Just have Jackass or Yr explain that opening the Barrow broke some kind of spell that preserved the tunnels around the Star Gate, and now they're starting to decay. That also gives a sense of urgency, in that they have to get out before the tunnels collapse altogether.

Yes, that would work! And it would also make sense if the Icarii cast a spell to kill any intruders before they left, too!

It's like he didn't realize that a tunnel might start to collapse after a few centuries. Moron. It's going to be nothing less than a miracle if Faraday somehow makes it to her destination unharmed with this fool looking out for her. He majorly sucks as a caregiver.

From what I have heard, she literally faints when she reaches her destination... so I agree even more readily.

If it was just Faraday who was exempt from digging, then I would say it's fine. But to not ask Yr to help for whatever reason, even though she's perfectly healthy...yeah. I'm catching a whiff of "Stand back, puny wimminz, let the men do this." Plus, since Yr is a supernatural being, it would make more sense for her to help dig, because she's probably not as tired as Timozel would be.

I do not even know why Jack would ask her to stand back, so it feels like author-mandated misogyny. Good going, Douglass!

Kiss your fingernails and the skin of your hands goodbye, Jack. Have you ever tried to dig hard-packed earth with just your hands? You're not going to like the end result, trust me.

And he expects to go through two metres of earth like this!

The phrase is "put your back into it", Douglass. And that phrasing just sounds weird. "His entire shoulders"? Put your entire pinky toe into it, too, while you're at it.

It almost reads like she is... trying to make her own expressions and failing at it? At the least, it is a sign this book needed editing.

This could have been a charming moment, in another book--say, if she was so desperate to get out of the tunnel that she's praying to anything and everything in the hopes of it working. On top of that, it could be a subtle hint that she's starting to open her mind to the idea of other deities, maybe without even realizing it herself.

That would have been a good idea! Alas, this book is not exactly subtle.

Douglass, you do realize that most animals don't smile to indicate pleasure, right? In fact, what you're describing is downright terrifying.

Yes, it very much is. And yet Jack will not say what these "pigs" actually are.

I would absolutely love it if Faraday took this insult and threw it right back in Yr's face. "Why, yes, I think I will ride on a pig for an hour or so, until I get my strength back. Thank you for the suggestion." And then proceeds to ride said pig with as much dignity as she would ride a horse.

Oh, me too! And why can they not ride these pigs? Based on what I know of them, I do not see why they would not do so if Jack told them to.

Why can't they just hunker down with the pigs? Living on the move like that, rather in pens, I assume that they're relatively clean. Just curl up in the middle of all of them, and you'd probably be fairly comfy.

Presumably because they still need food. Still, that would be a good fallback plan.