He explains that “[e]ight of the village men” were “out late checking the rabbit traps”
Wait, were they doing this at night? Because rabbits are nocturnal. You check the traps in the MORNING. And what's with "the rabbit traps" like it's some sort of village fixture that's supposed and expected to be there?
Harland says “proudly” that it was “a battle worthy of a bard in King Priam’s court”
So... bards are mighty warriors in this setting? I mean that's what it SAYS. This is what sloppy wording gets you, Douglass.
We are told he “omit[s] to mention that he and his family had hid underneath their bedstead until it was all over”
This is breaking POV and also not funny.
Well, Hagen’s words proved right and, in the days since, the villagers have not only “be[come] increasingly bold” about the prisoners, but they have also changed the story until “their bravery” and not “a combination of panic and ill-luck” captured Raum and Shra.
This isn't funny either. You can tell Douglass is just trying to make the villagers look bad, and this is just about the cheapest possible way of doing it.
Even in his haste, Axis notes Azhure blanch at this. Once again, has she not learned to keep her reactions hidden by now??
Long-term abuse victims are almost always incredibly good at masking, so yeah, this doesn't gel.
He answers that Raum and Shra are under “close guard”, and they will not escape. (So they naturally will later on.)
Because then there's suddenly just ONE GUY doing the guarding, and sucking at it so badly that he gets taken out by an unarmed woman with no combat training.
The stench coming from it is overwhelming, and Axis needs to cover his nose and mouth until he adapts to “the smell of old blood, stale urine and faeces”. …That does not bode well at all for Raum and Shra.
Just how long have they been here that the smell has gotten this bad?
Axis then says that every time he “encounter[s] unnecessary cruelty it sicken[s] him”, and now he can smell it in this cell. Well, let me keep this in mind for when Axis himself commits unnecessary cruelty.
Yeah, the hypocrisy here is really gross.
Hagen is overjoyed to see them and “exclaim[s] with delight” as he goes over to them, “pointing into the cell as if showing off prized pets”. Oh my, how evil.
Hagen's evil, like Gorge's, is so cartoonishly over the top that you just can't take it seriously at all. Meanwhile Axis' evil (and later Azhure's) is far, FAR too believable and awful.
Well, Ogden and Veremund are “white with anger”.
And you two are every bit as bad as he is, so get the fuck over yourselves. You don't react like this when it's humans being tortured (by Axis).
Huddled in a corner are “a dark man” and “a small female child of alien although attractive features”
This isn't his last paedophilia tinged moment with him and Shra either.
Also, this torture is indeed quite brutal and pointless, so… making these villagers look evil has worked.
Albeit in the clumsiest way possible.
Either way, four days seems like a quite short time to develop so many sores in.
Yeah, that they got this messed up in just four days is really straining credibility.
He is bleeding where he hit the bars, and he can feel the hilt of Axis’s sword in his “ample belly”.
You can tell he's evil because he's fat (the horror).
Further, Hagen has also given Axis a chance to rescue them; without him, Raum and Shra would already be dead now.
Axis could have just ordered the guy to let them go or have them cleaned up and fed - there's no way he doesn't outrank him. But nope. If there's an opportunity to beat up someone weaker than him you bet your booty he's gonna take it.
Hagen asks what Axis is talking about, unable to understand why Axis reacted like this. The village lads stand helplessly aside, as Belial, who looks “almost as furious” as Axis, stops them from trying to pull Axis off.
Because of course Belial is on Axis' side here, even though BOTH of them should have pretty much the exact same attitude as Hagen and the villagers, ie that the Forbidden are pure evil and deserve everything they get. I would have been okay with Axis saying something like "you should have just killed them out of hand instead of allowing this cruelty; they may be fiends who would have done the same to us, but we are better than they."
“They are filth, beasts, there is no point in treating them as if they understood what was going on. This is all they deserve.”
…What kind of reason is this?
Also, comma splice.
Axis goes white with fury, and mentally asks if Artor “call[s] for such treatment of prisoners”.
Um, YES? And you should fucking know that?
So they back up against the stairwell, “terrified that Axis [will] attack them next”.
Yeeeah, this is not how someone in Axis' position should be behaving.
Axis turned and caught Garland’s eyes. “You do not know what danger really means, Garland,” he said quietly but menacingly. Garland paled and shut up.
Oh get over yourself.
Like, Garland tries to warn him in good faith, and Axis replies with a death threat! It would be the least bit understandable if Garland had insulted Raum and Shra or something, but he is only trying to warn Axis! And then Axis sees fit to reply with what I can only see as a veiled death threat, considering what he did to Hagen. I hate him!
Join the club. Threatening people is Axis' immediate go-to reaction, when he doesn't instantly jump straight to violence. At "best" he just snaps and snarls at people.
At this, Ogden grabs Axis’s arm, and begs him to let the prisoners go, his “face completely distraught”. Axis, forgetting that Azhure is right behind him and “within easy listening distance”, throws Ogden’s hand off. He says that is not a sentiment “the Seneschal would approve of is it, Brother Ogden?”
YES, THE SENESCHAL YOU'VE SERVED YOUR ENTIRE LIFE YOU FUCKING SELF-RIGHTEOUS HYPOCRITE! Why is he suddenly going against what he should know damn well his "beloved foster father" Jaime would want?
That aside… yes, Axis feels no “anger or fear” toward Raum at all. Never mind that he helped burn witches for using magic, now he is completely unaffected. This makes no sense whatsoever.
Yeah, this is not how you show someone getting over their prejudice. You don't just have them "somehow" decide someone they've been taught to hate and fear from an early age isn't so bad after all.
If you want a good (if brutal and sometimes hard to watch) example of someone going through such a character arc, watch American History X
Short summary if you'd rather not or can't find a copy: it's about a Neo-Nazi who murders a black man and is sent to prison. While he's behind bars he joins up with the clique of other Neo-Nazi scumbags there, but his world is torn apart when they gang up on him and brutally assault him for doing something that displeased them. Meanwhile the other prisoner he's put on work detail with, a black guy, is a nice man who offers him friendship and sympathy which he ultimately accepts. When he is finally released from prison he's a changed man who now understands that the Neo-Nazis he once hung out with are vile human beings and that blacks aren't automatically his enemies. And this is a process that takes YEARS.
It also costs him enormously, as his former friends all turn on him after his release (including his girlfriend) when he tells them he doesn't believe in that white supremacy bullshit any more. It also puts a strain on his relationship with his younger brother who hero-worships him and wants to be just like him, and who he wants to save from going down the same road.
Nothing remotely resembling this rich tapestry ever happens with Axis. He switches sides at the drop of a hat and never has any doubts or regrets. Nor does he care a damn about the supposed relationships it costs him, most notably his relationship with his foster father Jaime. We're told he loves the guy and that the feeling is mutual, yet Axis has ZERO hesitation about turning against him, and indeed just wants to kill him in cold blood!
He says he recognised the uniform of the BattleAxe as soon as Axis stepped in. That uniform “has not changed in over a thousand years”, which seems quite unlikely to me—
My old highschool has only been around for about 40 years and has changed its uniforms multiple times. But then this is crap fantasy, where "a thousand years" is the equivalent of less than a century where social and technological change are concerned.
Axis grabbed Hagen and “half-murdered” him in a rage “that would have done a Horned One proud”. …I guess? The only time we have seen one angry was when Axis was in the Sacred Grove, and even then, I would see he was less angry (and with more reason) than Axis here. Also… good to see that Raum actually says Axis tried to murder Hagen, who is apparently still not conscious by now.
Now, Raum says, after four days of “unimaginable terror, pain and thirst”, the BattleAxe has disarmed and comes with a bucket of water in his hands and sympathy in his eyes. I do think you are thinking quite clearly for someone who has gone through this ordeal.
Yeah, by this point he should be comatose or at least too weak to be thinking much at all.
Axis puts the bucket on the floor and squats in front of Raum. He asks if Raum understands him and then Raum “nod[s] tiredly”
Because the old days when all three races "spoke a common language" apparently never actually ended in that respect.
He notes that Raum is “strong, very strong, and of strange features”, but he can see nothing “about [Raum]” to warrant “the tales of cruelty and evil” that the Seneschal tells. He asks himself what “creature of evil” can hold a child “so lovingly”.
Oh, I do like this! Axis is using reason, finding that what he sees does not accord with what he is told, and deciding to go with what he sees.
I don't agree, and I can give a very recent real-life example. In fact it even ties into my earlier discussion of American History X.
Just a couple of days ago I was at a local takeaway shop, and the customers ahead of me were a young man and his girlfriend. The two of them were laughing and smiling and chatting away with the server. They immediately struck me as really nice people.
Then I noticed the tattoos all over the man's exposed arms, neck and face.
Norse runes. An iron cross flag. A large bolded 1488 on his forearm.
If this "nice guy" who was acting all loving towards his girlfriend and being nice to someone working in customer service hadn't been covered in Neo-Nazi tattoos he clearly was making no effort to hide, I would never have even suspected.
Evil knows how to mask itself when necessary. Neo-Nazis, original Nazis, fucking serial killers, are perfectly capable of going home and playing with their kids and being loving toward their spouses while being complete monsters in other areas of their lives. Often those who live in their "nice person" area have no idea. The BTK Killer's daughter for example was completely blown away when she found out what her "loving father" really was.
So no, this shouldn't change Axis' opinion of Raum or the rest of the Forbidden at all. No doubt plenty of the "witches" he helped to burn at the stake had loving families too, but hell if he's going to ever give a thought to that
Axis’s throat tightens, and he gets consumed by “compassion for the little girl”. Tears fill his eyes.
Fast forward to book three and he's snarling about murdering an infant.
He stares unbelievingly, and he thinks that not even the Horned Ones can do this (because their powerset is very different, I presume) and certainly no human can!
Because Humans Are Lame. And again, the Horned Ones shouldn't be called that because antlers and horns are not the same thing!
So… then Axis’s father was a powerful Icarii Enchanter. We could already deduce this in chapter 2, and yet we have it revealed to us yet again.
Douglass had a horrible habit of constantly giving things away as early as possible, then pretending they were still Big Mysteries until it suited her.
Veremund whispers at Axis to save Shra.
We need her alive so she can become Azhure's enabler/cheerleader later on!
Then he checks himself and wonders why he is even trying to save them, as they are Forbidden. Oh, I like this conflict!
I don't, because it comes right the fuck out of nowhere with no explanation.
He looks back at Raum and then leaves the cell. He tells Belial to have two men clean the cell up.
And then to stay on as the only guard on duty, and be as lax as possible.
no subject
Ha, you used my name! Awesome.
Wait, were they doing this at night? Because rabbits are nocturnal. You check the traps in the MORNING. And what's with "the rabbit traps" like it's some sort of village fixture that's supposed and expected to be there?
So... bards are mighty warriors in this setting? I mean that's what it SAYS. This is what sloppy wording gets you, Douglass.
This is breaking POV and also not funny.
This isn't funny either. You can tell Douglass is just trying to make the villagers look bad, and this is just about the cheapest possible way of doing it.
Long-term abuse victims are almost always incredibly good at masking, so yeah, this doesn't gel.
Because then there's suddenly just ONE GUY doing the guarding, and sucking at it so badly that he gets taken out by an unarmed woman with no combat training.
Just how long have they been here that the smell has gotten this bad?
Yeah, the hypocrisy here is really gross.
Hagen's evil, like Gorge's, is so cartoonishly over the top that you just can't take it seriously at all. Meanwhile Axis' evil (and later Azhure's) is far, FAR too believable and awful.
And you two are every bit as bad as he is, so get the fuck over yourselves. You don't react like this when it's humans being tortured (by Axis).
This isn't his last paedophilia tinged moment with him and Shra either.
Albeit in the clumsiest way possible.
Yeah, that they got this messed up in just four days is really straining credibility.
You can tell he's evil because he's fat (the horror).
Axis could have just ordered the guy to let them go or have them cleaned up and fed - there's no way he doesn't outrank him. But nope. If there's an opportunity to beat up someone weaker than him you bet your booty he's gonna take it.
Because of course Belial is on Axis' side here, even though BOTH of them should have pretty much the exact same attitude as Hagen and the villagers, ie that the Forbidden are pure evil and deserve everything they get. I would have been okay with Axis saying something like "you should have just killed them out of hand instead of allowing this cruelty; they may be fiends who would have done the same to us, but we are better than they."
Also, comma splice.
Um, YES? And you should fucking know that?
Yeeeah, this is not how someone in Axis' position should be behaving.
Oh get over yourself.
Join the club. Threatening people is Axis' immediate go-to reaction, when he doesn't instantly jump straight to violence. At "best" he just snaps and snarls at people.
YES, THE SENESCHAL YOU'VE SERVED YOUR ENTIRE LIFE YOU FUCKING SELF-RIGHTEOUS HYPOCRITE! Why is he suddenly going against what he should know damn well his "beloved foster father" Jaime would want?
Yeah, this is not how you show someone getting over their prejudice. You don't just have them "somehow" decide someone they've been taught to hate and fear from an early age isn't so bad after all.
If you want a good (if brutal and sometimes hard to watch) example of someone going through such a character arc, watch American History X
Short summary if you'd rather not or can't find a copy: it's about a Neo-Nazi who murders a black man and is sent to prison. While he's behind bars he joins up with the clique of other Neo-Nazi scumbags there, but his world is torn apart when they gang up on him and brutally assault him for doing something that displeased them. Meanwhile the other prisoner he's put on work detail with, a black guy, is a nice man who offers him friendship and sympathy which he ultimately accepts. When he is finally released from prison he's a changed man who now understands that the Neo-Nazis he once hung out with are vile human beings and that blacks aren't automatically his enemies. And this is a process that takes YEARS.
It also costs him enormously, as his former friends all turn on him after his release (including his girlfriend) when he tells them he doesn't believe in that white supremacy bullshit any more. It also puts a strain on his relationship with his younger brother who hero-worships him and wants to be just like him, and who he wants to save from going down the same road.
Nothing remotely resembling this rich tapestry ever happens with Axis. He switches sides at the drop of a hat and never has any doubts or regrets. Nor does he care a damn about the supposed relationships it costs him, most notably his relationship with his foster father Jaime. We're told he loves the guy and that the feeling is mutual, yet Axis has ZERO hesitation about turning against him, and indeed just wants to kill him in cold blood!
My old highschool has only been around for about 40 years and has changed its uniforms multiple times. But then this is crap fantasy, where "a thousand years" is the equivalent of less than a century where social and technological change are concerned.
But the Avar are totally anti-violence, honest! Also if Hagen has been out for this long then he's probably not going to wake up, or at least not without some serious consequences. https://www.headway.org.uk/about-brain-injury/individuals/types-of-brain-injury/traumatic-brain-injury/how-severe-is-the-brain-injury/
Yeah, by this point he should be comatose or at least too weak to be thinking much at all.
Because the old days when all three races "spoke a common language" apparently never actually ended in that respect.
I don't agree, and I can give a very recent real-life example. In fact it even ties into my earlier discussion of American History X.
Just a couple of days ago I was at a local takeaway shop, and the customers ahead of me were a young man and his girlfriend. The two of them were laughing and smiling and chatting away with the server. They immediately struck me as really nice people.
Then I noticed the tattoos all over the man's exposed arms, neck and face.
Norse runes. An iron cross flag. A large bolded 1488 on his forearm.
If this "nice guy" who was acting all loving towards his girlfriend and being nice to someone working in customer service hadn't been covered in Neo-Nazi tattoos he clearly was making no effort to hide, I would never have even suspected.
Evil knows how to mask itself when necessary. Neo-Nazis, original Nazis, fucking serial killers, are perfectly capable of going home and playing with their kids and being loving toward their spouses while being complete monsters in other areas of their lives. Often those who live in their "nice person" area have no idea. The BTK Killer's daughter for example was completely blown away when she found out what her "loving father" really was.
So no, this shouldn't change Axis' opinion of Raum or the rest of the Forbidden at all. No doubt plenty of the "witches" he helped to burn at the stake had loving families too, but hell if he's going to ever give a thought to that
Fast forward to book three and he's snarling about murdering an infant.
Because Humans Are Lame. And again, the Horned Ones shouldn't be called that because antlers and horns are not the same thing!
Douglass had a horrible habit of constantly giving things away as early as possible, then pretending they were still Big Mysteries until it suited her.
We need her alive so she can become Azhure's enabler/cheerleader later on!
I don't, because it comes right the fuck out of nowhere with no explanation.
And then to stay on as the only guard on duty, and be as lax as possible.
Same Teres-time, same Teres-channel!