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BattleAxe First Read: Chapter Thirty-Two: The Prisoners
Chapter Thirty-One | Table of Contents | Chapter Thirty-Three (Part I)
SCSF: A good day, everyone, and welcome back to BattleAxe! Last time, Axis arrived in Smeartown Smyrton, we met Azhure, and Axis learned that the people of Smyrton are holding Raum and Shra prisoner.
For the reader post:
Wolfgoddess notes that it makes little sense that the road to Smyrton is clear while the fields are not. After all, this late in the year the fields should be cleared, and it makes no sense that the road would take such priority.
Ill Logic: 165
Further, I am now convinced that the description of Smyrton, given how “saccharine” it is, should get this:
Tone Soap: 39
She further notes that Axis having Belaguez rear like he does would require him to pull back hard on the reins, which could tear up the corners of Belaguez’s mouth. Yes, Axis supposedly had him rear like this by “touching his heels to Belaguez’s flanks”… but we kind of need to know that Axis has trained Belaguez for this, so…
Morals for Thee But Not for Me: 96
She also notes some further classism in the description of the villagers.
All the Isms: 28
Chessy notes that my gripe about “sixty or seventy houses” is not actually reasonable, as this construction is not uncommon.
PPP: 246 (-1)
She further notes that, if Douglass wanted this to be accurate to the Catholic Church, Hagen would have had to have married before becoming a Brother. I can see it as some actual worldbuilding, but I have the distinct feeling Douglass did not care to look into it.
It’s Like We’re Smart But We’re Not: 38
I also wonder why Axis even thinks that Hagen would have married while he was a Brother. Azhure is twenty-eight, so let me say that Hagen married thirty years ago. Since he is not mentioned to be old here, I would think he would have married in his twenties, and presumably on the younger side of that. Given that, I think it is quite possible that he would not have been a Brother yet. But naturally Axis just knows this.
Ill Logic: 166
She (along with Wolfgoddess) also points out that Axis and Belial are indeed laughing about Hagen’s wife leaving him, which is… not great.
Morals for Thee But Not for Me: 97
Finally, she leaves a fic with Ceolmund and the Sentinels.
Epistler notes that Faraday’s two sisters are both older than her, so why is Faraday so rich? Come to think of it, why would Annwin (the oldest sister) not have been the one to marry Borneheld?
It’s Like We’re Smart But We’re Not: 39
She further notes that the older sisters should have moved from Faraday’s estate (Ilfracombe) if they are married.
It’s Like We’re Smart But We’re Not: 40
I am quite sure this is the result of Douglass only coming up with Faraday’s sisters around this point, and not bothering to apply that information earlier (or indeed to mention it in Faraday’s introduction!).
PPP: 261 (+10)
She also notes that there should be some kind of “law enforcement” to stop these bandits. Yes, Isend and Merlion are not available to help stop this, but should Annwin not be able to send some forces to stop the bandits? Yes, I know this is probably to show off how good the Axe-Wielders are, but you could also have them show that off up north, where they are supposed to be.
It’s Like We’re Smart But We’re Not: 41
Finally, I noticed that Yr said, in chapter 30, that the Axe-Wielders will be in Smyrton “on their way to Sigholt and Gorkenfort”. So yes, the Axe-Wielders will be going to Sigholt from Smyrton, even though there has literally been no mention of that whatsoever before that point! This is very sloppy writing, Douglass!
PPP: 271 (+10)
(I am also a bit pleased that I am the one to spot this when I did not even know they actually did all go to Sigholt.)
Well, let me go on with the next chapter, then!
Chapter Thirty-Two: The Prisoners
That is a quite accurate chapter title, since we will be seeing quite a bit of Raum and Shra in this chapter.
We open with Axis staring at Hagen, with his cup of ale in his hand. He is astonished and asks “You’ve what?” Belial puts his own mug down, “all traces of amusement wiped from his eyes”. Hagen is naturally pleased by the reaction he has caused. He explains that “[e]ight of the village men” were “out late checking the rabbit traps” when they chanced upon Raum and Shra “trying to cower behind Goodman Harland’s haystack”.
Hmm, would they really need eight people to check the traps? If these are close enough to the village that checking them leads them to the haystack, and since the village only has 60-70 houses, I do not think that would be necessary. Also, I get the impression they were walking in a clump, which would do nothing to make checking the traps easier. I am quite sure this is just a convenience of Douglass’s, and it shows.
Ill Logic: 167
Harland says “proudly” that it was “a battle worthy of a bard in King Priam’s court”. We are told he “omit[s] to mention that he and his family had hid underneath their bedstead until it was all over”. All right, his puffery is a bit funny, but then again, why would he not do so when talking to the BattleAxe? I doubt that Axis would exactly care to investigate this.
Further, I would rather like “neglected to mention” or “omitted” instead of “omitted to mention”.
PPP: 272
Edit: I checked, and it seems that this is a rather old-fashioned phrase. Chessy is right: Douglass does quite love those.
Also, are we really supposed to look down on Harland for hiding? He would genuinely believe the Avar are all proficient in evil magic, so staying out of the line of fire is the sensible thing to do.
Hagen glares at Harland, and turns back to Axis. He says the men trusted in Artor to protect them from the “dark magic”, and they have “brave men in this village”. So Douglass then tells us what really happened.
The men “had run in terror” when they first found Raum and Shra behind the haystack, “fearing their dark magic”. One of the older men tripped and dropped his lantern, which lit the haystack on fire. Raum and Shra tried to escape but fell themselves. The village men would have “skewered then with their pitchforks”, but Hagen, who was alerted by this fuss, came and ordered that Raum and Shra be imprisoned in the church cellar. He said Raum might tell them if “other Forbidden” are around, and tells them not to worry, since Artor will protect them from “[Raum’s] evil sorcery”.
PPP: 273 (badly constructed sentence)
Well, Hagen’s words proved right and, in the days since, the villagers have not only “be[come] increasingly bold” about the prisoners, but they have also changed the story until “their bravery” and not “a combination of panic and ill-luck” captured Raum and Shra.
Hmm, are we supposed to think bad of them for reworking this story? Yes, they are being untruthful, but they are expecting a visit from the BattleAxe, so, as I said, wanting to show off makes sense. It does not hinder Axis in his investigation either. I also get the feeling we are supposed to look down on them somewhat for fleeing? That is still the sensible thing to do, though.
I also gather from this that the villagers of Smyrton only fear Raum and Shra for their “evil magic”. That is positive, since it means they might be brought to reason by being shown that Raum and Shra cannot actually do that.
Axis nods at the story, and says he is sure the men are “extraordinary”. He does not think that “[t]wo against eight” is a great battle. Well, Axis, that depends very much on the abilities of the combatants, and a host of other factors, too. For example, good luck defeating Gorgrael and Borneheld with seven Smyrton villagers at your back!
Ill Logic: 168
Axis wants to see the “creatures” right now, and he gets up so quickly he nearly knocks over his chair. Hagen rises slower, saying that they have “interrogated them extensively”, but have learned nothing. “The beasts” refused to answer any questions, and they will all be relieved when they can burn them. Even in his haste, Axis notes Azhure blanch at this. Once again, has she not learned to keep her reactions hidden by now??
Ill Logic: 169
Hagen leads them outside and “across the courtyard” to the church. Um, what “courtyard”? There has been no mention of the church being connected to Hagen’s home.
PPP: 273
The church’s back door is unlocked and Axis looks “questioningly” at Hagen. He answers that Raum and Shra are under “close guard”, and they will not escape. (So they naturally will later on.) There is no one in the church, and they go to a stairwell and follow that into the cellar. Axis, whose heart is “racing” almost pushes Hagen to get to the bottom sooner. Well before he reaches the cellar, though, “a sickening stench” has him “choke momentarily” and he begins to ask what this is… but Hagen already leads him into the “windowless cellar”. Then he was not “well before” the cellar when he smelled the stench, Douglass.
PPP: 274
The rear quarter of the cellar is “partitioned off with sturdy metal bars” and is usually used as “lock-up for drunken husbands”, we are told. Now, though, it is used for a “more vile purpose”. The stench coming from it is overwhelming, and Axis needs to cover his nose and mouth until he adapts to “the smell of old blood, stale urine and faeces”. …That does not bode well at all for Raum and Shra.
Axis then says that every time he “encounter[s] unnecessary cruelty it sicken[s] him”, and now he can smell it in this cell. Well, let me keep this in mind for when Axis himself commits unnecessary cruelty. Finally, he manages to look at the cell and see Ogden and Veremund have already managed to find their way down here. Hagen is overjoyed to see them and “exclaim[s] with delight” as he goes over to them, “pointing into the cell as if showing off prized pets”. Oh my, how evil. I would rather see just what kind of state Raum and Shra are in. Well, Ogden and Veremund are “white with anger”.
So Axis finally gets himself together and looks in… and “within the space of a heartbeat he completely and utterly [loses] his temper”. …That in and of itself is already a horror scenario.
Axis Is Angry: 13
Huddled in a corner are “a dark man” and “a small female child of alien although attractive features”. Um, Raum has “olive skin”; that does not go well with describing him as a “dark man”. Also, why does Axis only note that Shra has “alien features”? Finally, why does he think of only two has “attractive” features?? This is some very unfortunate word choice.
Consent No, Incest Yes: 5
PPP: 275 (why can Axis see Shra so much better than Raum?)
They are both “naked, filthy and covered with bruises and abrasions”. Ouch. Then we learn that there are “two village lads” who act as guards, and they are holding “long iron bars”. (Why did we not learn they were there when Axis first entered the room?)
PPP: 276
From that, he guesses that the “interrogation” consisted of “poking and prodding” (and probably also beating) them until they confessed to whatever crime Hagen wants them to. So Douglass understands that such torture would not actually work? I am impressed! Also, this torture is indeed quite brutal and pointless, so… making these villagers look evil has worked. Axis says further that obviously no one has been inside to clean the cell, or to offer them “the simply decency of a bucket for their bodily needs”.
They also have “[s]ores running across their lips and down their faces”, which suggest that they have not had water in the four days since “the good people of Smyrton” have imprisoned them “in this iron-barred chamber of horrors”. Well, that is appropriately horrible, though I might wish we had some solid evidence for this.
Also… I cannot find anything about dehydration causing “sores”. I would expect that their lips, at least, would be cracked, but I see that sores are rather caused by impaired blood circulation. Either way, four days seems like a quite short time to develop so many sores in.
It’s Like We’re Smart But We’re Not: 42
Further, they really have spent four days without any water. Axis also smelled “old blood”, so they would also have lost water that way. Combined with the torture they have been through… and I highly doubt they would have survived this long.
It’s Like We’re Smart But We’re Not: 43
I am quite sure this is because Douglass wanted to have a “dark” torture, but she shot past that into “idiotic”, as the villagers need to have them alive if they want to execute them.
Edgy Equals Mature, Right?: 19
Ill Logic: 170
Then Raum’s eyes, “full of velvet darkness”, meet Axis’s, and Axis comes into action. He calls Hagen a “curdled clot of whore’s piss” and slams him against the bars of the cell. Axis asks in whose name he dares to treat anyone like this. Hagen goes “as white as the underbelly of a fish”. We shift to his perspective. Axis has him pinned by his throat “so viciously” he can hardly breathe, and looms over him “with a look […] that suggest[s] Hagen [is] not long for this world”. He is bleeding where he hit the bars, and he can feel the hilt of Axis’s sword in his “ample belly”.
All the Isms: 29 (do we really need to hear about his “ample belly” now?)
Well, there we have Axis being “needlessly cruel”. After all, this does nothing to help! He should have Hagen open the cell for him and have him do something about the state of Raum and Shra, if he is to force Hagen to do anything at all! Also, given the condition Raum and Shra are in now, he needs to help them as soon as possible. He is actively hurting them by messing around with Hagen!
Morals for Thee But Not for Me: 99
Further, Hagen has also given Axis a chance to rescue them; without him, Raum and Shra would already be dead now. That does naturally not mean this treatment was in any way good, but it is still better than outright killing them. Naturally, Axis does not recognise this… and he apparently also thinks that Hagen personally beat Raum and Shra up, which was also not the case.
Hagen asks what Axis is talking about, unable to understand why Axis reacted like this. The village lads stand helplessly aside, as Belial, who looks “almost as furious” as Axis, stops them from trying to pull Axis off. After all, it would not do if Axis is inconvenienced in trying to murder Hagen! Hagen finally whispers this:
“They are filth, beasts, there is no point in treating them as if they understood what was going on. This is all they deserve.”
…What kind of reason is this? I can kind of get the “they are filth, so we treat them like filth” reasoning, but we have notably not established that the Acharites look down on the Forbidden. Something like “this will weaken them, so they cannot do anything dangerous” would work much better. Also, what is this line about “no point in treating them like they understand”? What does this have to do with your treatment of them?
FYRP: 114
Ill Logic: 171
Papier-Mâché Villains: 24
I guess Hagen saying some “evil” things, like calling them “filth” and “beasts” and saying they deserve it, is enough to make this make sense. Or that is what Douglass probably thought, at least.
Axis goes white with fury, and mentally asks if Artor “call[s] for such treatment of prisoners”. I think you should know the answer to that, Axis. He says that Hagen himself is filth, and then grabs him by the hair and habit and “hurl[s] him against the far wall of the cellar where he crashe[s] senseless to the floor”.
I… Axis just flung him to the wall and now he is unconsciousness. Hagen probably has a concussion, too. So it is evil for Hagen to spare Raum and Shra’s life and have them tortured for information, but Axis knocking Hagen out for no good reason is good? Ah, that is probably his “righteous anger”, so he is ~justified~. This is still “unnecessary cruelty”, Axis.
Morals for Thee But Not for Me: 100
Because I am rather focussed on the analysis, I have not really had the opportunity to hate Axis before now, but this… (shakes head) It is also notably the first time he has tried to murder someone, so that helps, too.
Well, Hordley and Garland… wait, she called him Harland twice at the beginning of this chapter! Did you even read what you wrote again, Douglass??
PPP: 278 (+2)
So they back up against the stairwell, “terrified that Axis [will] attack them next”. Azhure stands her ground and retains her composure, however. She says that she brought water and food the past days, while pointing to “a bucket and a tray of food” near the base of the stairwell. Hagen would not let her, though. Axis “gruffly” tells her to get the water.
Then its the turn of the guards. Axis turns on his heel to face them, and they back up against the wall, “patently horrified”. They wonder what they have done wrong.
Let me explain, then, in language they might use: you have tortured this small child. She can barely speak, so you cannot get much useful information out of her, and, due to her age, she is unlikely to either be adept at dark magic or to have done much wrong. And yet, you have not only tortured her, you also want her executed for no adequate reason. It would be far better to adopt her, so she could live her life away from the Forbidden.
As for the man, there is no point in torturing him any further; he has already demonstrated that you can get no information from him, and so continuing this until his execution is simply needless cruelty.
I do not agree with what I said here, but I do think it should be possible to explain this to them like I did. So, Axis does not do any of that. Instead, he tells Belial to get the keys to the cell from “these craven deformities that think to call themselves men”. He does not trust himself to get “too close to them”. Then keep your anger under control, Axis. It truly is not so hard.
Belial grabs the keys from a guard, who “void[s] in sheer terror”. …You just used “piss” and showed Raum and Shra be graphically tortured, but we apparently need to use “void” here.
Tone Soap: 40
Belial then throws the keys to Axis for some reason, and their eyes meet in “complete understanding”. Whatever they might think about the prisoners, no one ever treats prisoners like this, nor does “anyone ever imprison a child that [can] barely walk”. …I am expecting Axis or Belial to do just what they deem unthinkable.
Arthur opens the cell, “feeling” Azhure behind him with the bucket. Garland “gasp[s] in horror”, and tells Axis not to go inside, because they are “dangerous”. They have also not eaten or drunk in four days, and Axis is the BattleAxe. I doubt he will be in much danger. Then we get this:
Axis turned and caught Garland’s eyes. “You do not know what danger really means, Garland,” he said quietly but menacingly. Garland paled and shut up.
Well, Axis, you do not know either, since I am quite sure it would be possible for me to go to Tencendor and give my own torture skills a workout on you. I am quite motivated to by this, at least.
Like, Garland tries to warn him in good faith, and Axis replies with a death threat! It would be the least bit understandable if Garland had insulted Raum and Shra or something, but he is only trying to warn Axis! And then Axis sees fit to reply with what I can only see as a veiled death threat, considering what he did to Hagen. I hate him!
Morals for Thee But Not for Me: 101
At this, Ogden grabs Axis’s arm, and begs him to let the prisoners go, his “face completely distraught”. Axis, forgetting that Azhure is right behind him and “within easy listening distance”, throws Ogden’s hand off. He says that is not a sentiment “the Seneschal would approve of is it, Brother Ogden?”
Yes, the Seneschal would not approve of that, but Ogden might just want to get them out of this very unhygienic place, because that is bad for them! This does not have to mean anything about him not being a Brother, Axis!
Ill Logic: 172
This is also quite badly edited. We have multiple speakers per paragraph (which we also had when Azhure spoke).
PPP: 280 (+2)
Above, I do not think that “quietly” contradicts “menacingly”, since speaking threats quietly is often supposed to be menacing.
PPP: 281
Further, this last sentence should read “a sentiment the Seneschal would approve of. Is it, Brother Ogden?” Now we have two sentences merged into one.
PPP: 282
Also, if Azhure is standing directly behind Axis, it stands to reason that she can hear their exchange!
PPP: 283
Azhure frowns at this exchange for some reason (and why was this important?), but then Axis throws open the cell door, “leaving his sword and axe by the door”, and walks toward Raum and Shra. I… appreciate the gesture, though I wonder why Axis would find it necessary to leave his sword and axe. Azhure slips in, and Belial goes to guard the door.
As they are halfway across, Axis grabs Azhure’s arm. He tells her to wait and takes the bucket over from her. Axis hesitates before going to the prisoners. He says he always wondered how he would react to the Forbidden. So this happens:
Now, instead of the anger or fear that the Seneschal had taught him, Axis found himself regarding these two with sympathy and, even more confusingly, empathy. Looking into the great dark eyes of the man, Axis discovered that he was incapable of hating or even fearing this man.
Yes, thank you for repeating this, Douglass. I think I had best rename Hand-Holding back to We Understand Already.
We Understand Already: 19
That aside… yes, Axis feels no “anger or fear” toward Raum at all. Never mind that he helped burn witches for using magic, now he is completely unaffected. This makes no sense whatsoever.
FYRP: 115
Godmode Engaged: 7
This is also very easy to fix. Have Axis note that Raum does not seem very dangerous, that he is not hostile to him, and that Raum has been tortured. Those things, of themselves, would go quite a way to showing why Axis is not angry or afraid. That is all that is required and yet Douglass managed to miss it. Good going!
Cut to Raum, who watches Axis approach. He says he recognised the uniform of the BattleAxe as soon as Axis stepped in. That uniform “has not changed in over a thousand years”, which seems quite unlikely to me—
Cardboard Worldbuilding: 70
—and every Avar is raised to “fear and loathe it”. But, just when Raum was about to kill himself and Shra (and “commend [them] to the Sacred Grove for eternity”) everything “exploded” in a direction he “could never have foreseen”. Axis grabbed Hagen and “half-murdered” him in a rage “that would have done a Horned One proud”. …I guess? The only time we have seen one angry was when Axis was in the Sacred Grove, and even then, I would see he was less angry (and with more reason) than Axis here. Also… good to see that Raum actually says Axis tried to murder Hagen, who is apparently still not conscious by now.
Now, Raum says, after four days of “unimaginable terror, pain and thirst”, the BattleAxe has disarmed and comes with a bucket of water in his hands and sympathy in his eyes. I do think you are thinking quite clearly for someone who has gone through this ordeal.
It’s Like We’re Smart But We’re Not: 43
Raum hugs Shra to his chest “protectively”. She has been unconscious for the past half day and is now “scarcely breathing”. So, Axis, you apparently needing to threaten the villagers might just have meant death for Shra. You should have guessed that they needed urgent help from the state they were in!
Morals for Thee But Not for Me: 102 (another point for just how close Shra is to death, which he should have seen in his look)
Axis puts the bucket on the floor and squats in front of Raum. He asks if Raum understands him and then Raum “nod[s] tiredly”. Axis looks at him. He notes that Raum is “strong, very strong, and of strange features”, but he can see nothing “about [Raum]” to warrant “the tales of cruelty and evil” that the Seneschal tells. He asks himself what “creature of evil” can hold a child “so lovingly”.
Oh, I do like this! Axis is using reason, finding that what he sees does not accord with what he is told, and deciding to go with what he sees. Raum’s behaviour indeed does not make much sense if he is supposed to be a “creature of evil”, like the Seneschal says. (Not that that is exactly accurate to the source, I think.) So I am quite sure that education would actually work in this case, unlike the mind-control that Ogden and Veremund see fit to deploy.
ETA because I was clearly not thinking while writing this: Axis's behaviour is naturally complete nonsense. He is the literal BattleAxe of the Seneschal, and, as he says, he is under oaths to kill them. He would not be getting over his beliefs this quickly. It is certainly possible, but something like this would take time. Now, I might expect him to kill Raum outright, as Raum himself says. What we get is a shortcut by Douglass to not have to deal with this process and to make Axis look "clean", I am sure. And, because I appreciated this after the violence Axis shows, wholly fell for it.
So, my apologies for forgetting what I set out to do (looking at this book critically), and I will certainly be better about it. This may be a "first read", but you are still quite right in expecting something better than this. I also want to thank Epistler very much for pointing out how I went wrong. Finally, have this:
FYRP: 125 (+10)
Godmode Engaged: 8
Axis thinks to what Ogden said about “these people” and asks if Raum is Avar. Raum is a bit surprised and then nods somewhat more strongly. Axis looks at Shra. She has been “brutally treated” and Axis can see she is near death. Her breathing is irregular and shallow, and “gurgl[es] through fluid-filled lungs”, and her “fingernails and lips [have] a bluish tinge”. Well, that sucks. Axis’s throat tightens, and he gets consumed by “compassion for the little girl”. Tears fill his eyes.
He very quietly asks Raum to let him hold Shra. After hesitating for an instant, Raum holds out “the little girl’s limp body”. After all, she will need Axis’s help if she is to survive any longer. Axis gently “gather[s] her [] into his arms”. Then he puts his hand in the bucket and washes some dirt off her face. And then… he begins to sing for her very, very softly. It is a “strange song”, we are told, “with no melody, filled with breathy catches and lilts, but extraordinarily compelling and beautiful”.
Can’t Argue With Icarii: 8 (of course it is “extraordinarily beautiful”)
Raum is shocked to “the core of his being”. He has only heard this Song (capitalised) once before, and then no human sang it. Only “the most powerful of Icarii Enchanters” can sing it, but even they are normally too weak to have it work. He stares unbelievingly, and he thinks that not even the Horned Ones can do this (because their powerset is very different, I presume) and certainly no human can!
So… then Axis’s father was a powerful Icarii Enchanter. We could already deduce this in chapter 2, and yet we have it revealed to us yet again.
This Is What the Mystery: 23
Azhure is puzzled and wonders what Axis is doing to Shra. Ogden and Veremund can feel the Song, and they get tears in their eyes. Veremund whispers at Axis to save Shra.
Back with Raum, he only has eyes for Shra and Axis. Axis’s voice “grow[s] in intensity, though not in volume”, and then… Shra begins to move! First she does so with “[t]iny, jerky actions”, but then stronger movements as she squirms in Axis’s arms. Axis stops singing, looks at Shra, and then smiles at Raum. He says Shra lives, “genuine surprise in his voice”. Ooh, that is nice! Raum has “the strangest feeling” that Axis does not quite know what he has done. Would you think?
This Is What the Mystery: 24
Raum holds out his arms for Shra, but Axis keeps holding her. She is now awake and stares at Axis “curiously”, and then reaches out to touch his beard. Axis says “very softly” that he can get her out of the cell for the night, but he is not sure he can save their lives. After all, as BattleAxe, he is bound by “oaths” to “destroy the Forbidden”. That is the first we have heard of that; it might have been nice to bring up earlier.
Then he checks himself and wonders why he is even trying to save them, as they are Forbidden. Oh, I like this conflict! Raum nods, as he understands that the BattleAxe is the “last person in the land” who will try to save them. Still, he thinks, what has Axis done for Shra? No BattleAxe could have sung that Song. So he touches Axis’s cheek with his fingertips. He says he understands, but he does not know why someone with “the soul of an Icarii Enchanter” wears the uniform of BattleAxe. After all, surely the Icarii “hate as much as [the Avar] do”? He then thanks Axis for bringing Shra back to life. As he drops his hand, he touches the axes on Axis’s breast.
Well, at this, Axis’s “face harden[s]” and he gets up, trying not to think about what Raum means. He gives Shra to Azhure and tells her to look after the child during the night. He looks back at Raum and then leaves the cell. He tells Belial to have two men clean the cell up. Then he glares at Hagen, who is conscious again (though he should have quite some trouble from this), ignores Ogden and Veremund and walks out without another word. There the chapter ends.
Well, the ending was not half bad (and giving Shra to Azhure to care for is about the best thing he can do here). I wish we could have had this for the entire chapter, instead of Axis beating up and threatening the villagers! And I note that has been mostly glossed over in the last part of this chapter…
Either way, until next time!
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Ha, you used my name! Awesome.
Wait, were they doing this at night? Because rabbits are nocturnal. You check the traps in the MORNING. And what's with "the rabbit traps" like it's some sort of village fixture that's supposed and expected to be there?
So... bards are mighty warriors in this setting? I mean that's what it SAYS. This is what sloppy wording gets you, Douglass.
This is breaking POV and also not funny.
This isn't funny either. You can tell Douglass is just trying to make the villagers look bad, and this is just about the cheapest possible way of doing it.
Long-term abuse victims are almost always incredibly good at masking, so yeah, this doesn't gel.
Because then there's suddenly just ONE GUY doing the guarding, and sucking at it so badly that he gets taken out by an unarmed woman with no combat training.
Just how long have they been here that the smell has gotten this bad?
Yeah, the hypocrisy here is really gross.
Hagen's evil, like Gorge's, is so cartoonishly over the top that you just can't take it seriously at all. Meanwhile Axis' evil (and later Azhure's) is far, FAR too believable and awful.
And you two are every bit as bad as he is, so get the fuck over yourselves. You don't react like this when it's humans being tortured (by Axis).
This isn't his last paedophilia tinged moment with him and Shra either.
Albeit in the clumsiest way possible.
Yeah, that they got this messed up in just four days is really straining credibility.
You can tell he's evil because he's fat (the horror).
Axis could have just ordered the guy to let them go or have them cleaned up and fed - there's no way he doesn't outrank him. But nope. If there's an opportunity to beat up someone weaker than him you bet your booty he's gonna take it.
Because of course Belial is on Axis' side here, even though BOTH of them should have pretty much the exact same attitude as Hagen and the villagers, ie that the Forbidden are pure evil and deserve everything they get. I would have been okay with Axis saying something like "you should have just killed them out of hand instead of allowing this cruelty; they may be fiends who would have done the same to us, but we are better than they."
Also, comma splice.
Um, YES? And you should fucking know that?
Yeeeah, this is not how someone in Axis' position should be behaving.
Oh get over yourself.
Join the club. Threatening people is Axis' immediate go-to reaction, when he doesn't instantly jump straight to violence. At "best" he just snaps and snarls at people.
YES, THE SENESCHAL YOU'VE SERVED YOUR ENTIRE LIFE YOU FUCKING SELF-RIGHTEOUS HYPOCRITE! Why is he suddenly going against what he should know damn well his "beloved foster father" Jaime would want?
Yeah, this is not how you show someone getting over their prejudice. You don't just have them "somehow" decide someone they've been taught to hate and fear from an early age isn't so bad after all.
If you want a good (if brutal and sometimes hard to watch) example of someone going through such a character arc, watch American History X
Short summary if you'd rather not or can't find a copy: it's about a Neo-Nazi who murders a black man and is sent to prison. While he's behind bars he joins up with the clique of other Neo-Nazi scumbags there, but his world is torn apart when they gang up on him and brutally assault him for doing something that displeased them. Meanwhile the other prisoner he's put on work detail with, a black guy, is a nice man who offers him friendship and sympathy which he ultimately accepts. When he is finally released from prison he's a changed man who now understands that the Neo-Nazis he once hung out with are vile human beings and that blacks aren't automatically his enemies. And this is a process that takes YEARS.
It also costs him enormously, as his former friends all turn on him after his release (including his girlfriend) when he tells them he doesn't believe in that white supremacy bullshit any more. It also puts a strain on his relationship with his younger brother who hero-worships him and wants to be just like him, and who he wants to save from going down the same road.
Nothing remotely resembling this rich tapestry ever happens with Axis. He switches sides at the drop of a hat and never has any doubts or regrets. Nor does he care a damn about the supposed relationships it costs him, most notably his relationship with his foster father Jaime. We're told he loves the guy and that the feeling is mutual, yet Axis has ZERO hesitation about turning against him, and indeed just wants to kill him in cold blood!
My old highschool has only been around for about 40 years and has changed its uniforms multiple times. But then this is crap fantasy, where "a thousand years" is the equivalent of less than a century where social and technological change are concerned.
But the Avar are totally anti-violence, honest! Also if Hagen has been out for this long then he's probably not going to wake up, or at least not without some serious consequences. https://www.headway.org.uk/about-brain-injury/individuals/types-of-brain-injury/traumatic-brain-injury/how-severe-is-the-brain-injury/
Yeah, by this point he should be comatose or at least too weak to be thinking much at all.
Because the old days when all three races "spoke a common language" apparently never actually ended in that respect.
I don't agree, and I can give a very recent real-life example. In fact it even ties into my earlier discussion of American History X.
Just a couple of days ago I was at a local takeaway shop, and the customers ahead of me were a young man and his girlfriend. The two of them were laughing and smiling and chatting away with the server. They immediately struck me as really nice people.
Then I noticed the tattoos all over the man's exposed arms, neck and face.
Norse runes. An iron cross flag. A large bolded 1488 on his forearm.
If this "nice guy" who was acting all loving towards his girlfriend and being nice to someone working in customer service hadn't been covered in Neo-Nazi tattoos he clearly was making no effort to hide, I would never have even suspected.
Evil knows how to mask itself when necessary. Neo-Nazis, original Nazis, fucking serial killers, are perfectly capable of going home and playing with their kids and being loving toward their spouses while being complete monsters in other areas of their lives. Often those who live in their "nice person" area have no idea. The BTK Killer's daughter for example was completely blown away when she found out what her "loving father" really was.
So no, this shouldn't change Axis' opinion of Raum or the rest of the Forbidden at all. No doubt plenty of the "witches" he helped to burn at the stake had loving families too, but hell if he's going to ever give a thought to that
Fast forward to book three and he's snarling about murdering an infant.
Because Humans Are Lame. And again, the Horned Ones shouldn't be called that because antlers and horns are not the same thing!
Douglass had a horrible habit of constantly giving things away as early as possible, then pretending they were still Big Mysteries until it suited her.
We need her alive so she can become Azhure's enabler/cheerleader later on!
I don't, because it comes right the fuck out of nowhere with no explanation.
And then to stay on as the only guard on duty, and be as lax as possible.
Same Teres-time, same Teres-channel!
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Yes, that was really not thought through well. I'll put up a correction soon. (And done!)
Here's a (possibly) better version:
Axis finished looking through the bars of the cage and looked back at Hagen. "Was it necessary to keep these two alive for so long, Brother Hagen?"
"We just wished to know more about the activities of the Forbidden. This is the best source we have had in centuries!" Hagen said.
"You should have known they were not going to talk after a day. And yet you saw fit to keep two children with this Forbidden, Brother Hagen?" Hagen started to protest, but Axis cut him off. "It doesn't matter any more. May I have the keys?"
One of the lads threw them to him, and he deftly snatched them from the air. He opened the cell door and drew his sword. With four steps, he was standing over Raum. He waited for the man to attack, but when he did not, he cut the man's head off with a single stroke.
He looked at the child. It was very still, and when he bent down to hear her breathing, it was laboured and soft. So he did the best thing he knew to do and killed her too.
Then he left the cell and strode out of the cellar, ignoring the protests and clinging hands of Ogden and Veremund.
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SCSF: (Well, now to do better after the slip-up...)
Ha, you used my name! Awesome.
No problem! Given how negatively it is portrayed, I think Douglass meant to imply "Smeartown" as well.
Wait, were they doing this at night? Because rabbits are nocturnal. You check the traps in the MORNING. And what's with "the rabbit traps" like it's some sort of village fixture that's supposed and expected to be there?
I will add that in, then! (And some kind of explanation about the traps would have been good, too.)
This isn't funny either. You can tell Douglass is just trying to make the villagers look bad, and this is just about the cheapest possible way of doing it.
Certainly! It is especially bad since this is the rational thing to do!
Hagen's evil, like Gorge's, is so cartoonishly over the top that you just can't take it seriously at all. Meanwhile Axis' evil (and later Azhure's) is far, FAR too believable and awful.
Absolutely! I am quite sure it is because Hagen and Gorgrael are written to be evil caricatures, while Douglass thought Axis and Azhure were justified. She actually put some thought into the second, and so we can see why they are so evil. (Naturally the second variety is quite a bit more compelling.)
This isn't his last paedophilia tinged moment with him and Shra either.
Oh, lovely.
Axis could have just ordered the guy to let them go or have them cleaned up and fed - there's no way he doesn't outrank him. But nope. If there's an opportunity to beat up someone weaker than him you bet your booty he's gonna take it.
Yes, that would have been the smart thing to do; it would not cause resentment among the villagers, for one.
Because of course Belial is on Axis' side here, even though BOTH of them should have pretty much the exact same attitude as Hagen and the villagers, ie that the Forbidden are pure evil and deserve everything they get. I would have been okay with Axis saying something like "you should have just killed them out of hand instead of allowing this cruelty; they may be fiends who would have done the same to us, but we are better than they."
That would be quite smart! I also just note that Belial might well be complicit in murder if Axis keeps going, and yet he does not care at all.
Also, comma splice.
Noted!
Um, YES? And you should fucking know that?
It is indeed a bit weird to have the BattleAxe wonder about his scripture.
Yeah, this is not how you show someone getting over their prejudice. You don't just have them "somehow" decide someone they've been taught to hate and fear from an early age isn't so bad after all.
I have just read Azhure's story about how she met up with GoldFeather, and I wish we could have seen that story instead. In her case, it took quite a while before this happened, after all.
Nothing remotely resembling this rich tapestry ever happens with Axis. He switches sides at the drop of a hat and never has any doubts or regrets. Nor does he care a damn about the supposed relationships it costs him, most notably his relationship with his foster father Jaime. We're told he loves the guy and that the feeling is mutual, yet Axis has ZERO hesitation about turning against him, and indeed just wants to kill him in cold blood!
It is such utter nonsense! And such a "rich tapestry" is also a big draw for this kind of story. Instead, everyone is magically brainwashed into accepting the Forbidden, because Douglass apparently thought it needed to be resolved in this trilogy.
My old highschool has only been around for about 40 years and has changed its uniforms multiple times. But then this is crap fantasy, where "a thousand years" is the equivalent of less than a century where social and technological change are concerned.
Notably, in the forty years between this and Wayfarer Redemption, all kinds of things change, so it feels to me like Douglass pressed the pause button during the thousand years in between and let it play afterward.
Also if Hagen has been out for this long then he's probably not going to wake up, or at least not without some serious consequences.
Yep, that was about what I thought.
Yeah, by this point he should be comatose or at least too weak to be thinking much at all.
I guess Douglass just wanted him to be awake, because that would better suit her story.
discussion of prejudice
Yes, thank you for that!! The way Raum looks has nothing to do with who he is, and Axis, of all people, should know that very well!
(I think I wanted to have something positive to say about Douglass after the previous scene, and latched onto this without any deeper thought. Somewhat sloppy.)
Because Humans Are Lame. And again, the Horned Ones shouldn't be called that because antlers and horns are not the same thing!
I do not think I have marked that yet, so I will next time!
Douglass had a horrible habit of constantly giving things away as early as possible, then pretending they were still Big Mysteries until it suited her.
Oh, tell me about it.
I don't, because it comes right the fuck out of nowhere with no explanation.
Further, why does Axis even sing this song? I guess we will get some answers, but it feels completely random.
And then to stay on as the only guard on duty, and be as lax as possible.
Why is he even tying up his lieutenant like this? Surely Arne would be as good?
Same Teres-time, same Teres-channel!
Until then, for something more thorough.
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She beat Paolini to the punch by about a decade in that department.
They should be up in arms over him beating up their priest. I mean really.
She was one of those twits who think making the timescale hugely exaggerated makes it more "epic" instead of ridiculous.
Why indeed? Belial is his second in command, not a lowly sentry. And he's terrible at it anyway. (Also, NEVER have just one sentry, and especially not for a job this important. Axis doesn't even have any patrols set up to ensure nobody even gets into the building without permission).
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The only explanation I can think of is that maybe they were holding out hope for a better match for the eldest, since she would be the heir to the family's wealth (pretty much saying that the younger siblings aren't worth as much, so they can settle for less advantageous matches), but...Borneheld is royal. What better match could they be waiting for?
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And all she would have had to do is call them her younger sisters. I'm not sure if it would close all of the plot holes that their existence opens up, but it would surely help.
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Yes. We're supposed to sneer and mock him for being cowardly, no matter how logical it is for him to hide from something he thinks could destroy him without even blinking.
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Okay, honest question. Are there booby traps set up all over and around the village? Because this is Looney Toons levels of wacky clumsiness and slapstick shenanigans. I could buy the old man tripping and breaking the lantern. That's fine. But why do Raum and Shra trip, too, other than it makes it a convenient way to catch them?
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Yes. We're supposed to think they're lying liars who lie and sneer at them for being cowards who can't even tell the truth about what happened, even though if they did tell the truth, we're supposed to look down on them for that, too, because they were cowards who ran and hid. Douglass is determined to make them look bad no matter how they reacted.
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Douglass, you're not changing my mind about Axis being the Worst Leader Ever. In fact, you're just reinforcing my belief.
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You would think, but how would we notice something was up with her if Douglass wasn't running around with a giant flashing sign saying "PAY ATTENTION TO THIS!" She clearly doesn't trust her readers to be able to pick up on subtle clues.
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If there's no one in the church and the back door is unlocked, how are they under close guard? Cameras and motion detectors obviously don't exist in this setting, so remote surveillance isn't possible (unless maybe you use magic, but they're not). Even people who aren't used to having captives should know that this is not how you make sure they don't escape.
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I was about to say, that is the height of hypocrisy from Axis, there. But I guess it's perfectly fine when he does it. It's just that no one else is allowed to.
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Meanwhile, I'm exclaiming with despair. Where did these two idiots even come from? It's like characters completely disappear until they're necessary to the plot, and then they just pop up out of nowhere.
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*blows a shrill whistle* Back away from the toddler, Douglass! I will call the police on you!
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Unless their race is able to survive without water for longer than a human, they should be dead. The limit for going without water is three days, and I suspect that's in ideal conditions where you don't lose any moisture from your body or sustain any trauma.
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But of course. Anything the protagonist does is justified, even if it's the exact same kind of behavior that is looked down on when it comes from anyone else. I don't think Douglass knows how hypocrisy or morals work.
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Oh, don't worry. Us readers have been hating him plenty, so he hasn't been able to prance around these chapters doing whatever he wants with complete immunity. But please, do join us! Hating him can be quite cathartic, especially when you yell at him.
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All I can think is that Belial is afraid to get too close to Axis. Which doesn't speak well for Axis, since Belial is not only an ally, but is supposed to be Axis's best friend.
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Ooh, let me know when you start selling tickets for viewers. I'll be there in a heartbeat!
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The mention of 'Brother', I would think. If Hagen is associated with them, she might believe that these two assholes would treat her the same way Hagen does. (Admittedly, I could be grasping for straws, but that's honestly the only explanation I can come up with.)
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I'm noticing a theme here with this. That seems like Douglass's MO—or one of them, anyway.
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Oh, if you only knew, Axis...if you only knew.
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*sighs heavily* I'm not even surprised by this. I'm just tired. And disgusted. We don't need even more proof that Axis is a Gary Stu, Douglass. Stop wanking over his awesomeness.
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But of course, since Douglass doesn't think Axis did anything wrong. Why focus on it when he was "totally justified" in his actions? Blegh.
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(Do mind the ETA!)
The only explanation I can think of is that maybe they were holding out hope for a better match for the eldest, since she would be the heir to the family's wealth (pretty much saying that the younger siblings aren't worth as much, so they can settle for less advantageous matches), but...Borneheld is royal. What better match could they be waiting for?
SCSF: I cannot think of one, either. This is truly the dream scenario, so why would they not want to take it as soon as they could?
And all she would have had to do is call them her younger sisters. I'm not sure if it would close all of the plot holes that their existence opens up, but it would surely help.
I do think most of them would be closed.
Yes. We're supposed to sneer and mock him for being cowardly, no matter how logical it is for him to hide from something he thinks could destroy him without even blinking.
The disconnect between what she wrote and what she meant is really bad.
Okay, honest question. Are there booby traps set up all over and around the village? Because this is Looney Toons levels of wacky clumsiness and slapstick shenanigans. I could buy the old man tripping and breaking the lantern. That's fine. But why do Raum and Shra trip, too, other than it makes it a convenient way to catch them?
I could see this if there was some more description of their environment and what they could trip over.
Yes. We're supposed to think they're lying liars who lie and sneer at them for being cowards who can't even tell the truth about what happened, even though if they did tell the truth, we're supposed to look down on them for that, too, because they were cowards who ran and hid. Douglass is determined to make them look bad no matter how they reacted.
That would fit.
You would think, but how would we notice something was up with her if Douglass wasn't running around with a giant flashing sign saying "PAY ATTENTION TO THIS!" She clearly doesn't trust her readers to be able to pick up on subtle clues.
Yep, that is probably why Azhure is almost a cue card here.
If there's no one in the church and the back door is unlocked, how are they under close guard? Cameras and motion detectors obviously don't exist in this setting, so remote surveillance isn't possible (unless maybe you use magic, but they're not). Even people who aren't used to having captives should know that this is not how you make sure they don't escape.
Well, that is because of the guards down in the cellar, I am sure.
Meanwhile, I'm exclaiming with despair. Where did these two idiots even come from? It's like characters completely disappear until they're necessary to the plot, and then they just pop up out of nowhere.
I am reading a bit ahead now, and this is a big problem with Douglass. In this case, though, I assume they have used magic or something to find out already.
All I can think is that Belial is afraid to get too close to Axis. Which doesn't speak well for Axis, since Belial is not only an ally, but is supposed to be Axis's best friend.
I do not doubt that at all.
Ooh, let me know when you start selling tickets for viewers. I'll be there in a heartbeat!
Will do!
The mention of 'Brother', I would think. If Hagen is associated with them, she might believe that these two assholes would treat her the same way Hagen does. (Admittedly, I could be grasping for straws, but that's honestly the only explanation I can come up with.)
I think it is the sight of the BattleAxe disagreeing with Brothers of the Seneschal, rather.
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I don't know what it says about the content of this book that when you added the ETA, my mind immediately jumped to "Jerk One and Jerk Two are probably mind-controlling him to make him feel sympathy."
It could help to explain his absolutely bizarre behavior, but the fact that Douglass relies on it for everything is not only unsettling, it's disgusting. Why give the characters free will at all if everything they do is going to be because of mind-control?
(Again, there's no proof whatsoever that this is the case with Axis, so this is just me ranting. It's more likely that Douglass is just that bad of a writer.)
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Oh, you're right! I didn't even consider how it would look from an outside perspective for them to even disagree in the first place, let alone so aggressively.
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SCSF: I do not think it is a strange thing to think, especially since he wonders why he even did this in the next chapter.
Edit: I see it is meant to be "foreshadowing", since him being half-Icarii would mean that he somehow has sympathy for other Forbidden... At least, that is what Axis suggests.
Oh, you're right! I didn't even consider how it would look from an outside perspective for them to even disagree in the first place, let alone so aggressively.
Well, I only thought of it when I wrote it, so...
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Yeah, and it makes zero sense because empathy doesn't work like that at all. He's not even half Avar! (There don't seem to be any of those anywhere for some reason).
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Guard. Singular. I repeat, Axis leaves ONE GUY down there and that's Belial, who makes every guarding mistake in the book.
As you will ultimately see, Belial isn't Axis' friend so much as he is his enabler.
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SCSF: Well, I meant the multiple "village lads" present at the beginning of the chapter.
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SCSF: It might have been nice to find out, bu Douglass seems to have a problem with keeping track of stuff (for example, I noted the size of the Greater Avarinheim is contradicted later).
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And it could literally be fixed by just tweaking maybe two lines in the entire trilogy. Five minute edit at most, and bam.
When a character gets caught in this trilogy, it's ALWAYS because of convenient tripping. It happens with Faraday, too. In fact, in a chapter or so we'll see Raum suddenly fall over for no reason again, and this time he breaks something. You'd think someone who's lived in the forest his whole life would know how to run among trees without falling on his ass, but nope.
The more the narrative tediously blathers on about how Axis is a "great commander", the more absurd it becomes.
There's SO much hand-holding in this thing, and it gets significantly worse in book two. Once their initial roles are rendered irrelevant, all Ogden and Veremund do is hang around explaining what everything "means", no matter how blatantly obvious it is.
There should be at least two guards at every entrance and patrols outside at the very least. Further highlighting how utterly incompetent Axis and Belial are.
And just wait and see how utterly useless Belial proves to be in the very immediate future. He bungles his job so badly it should have warranted an immediate demotion.
One of the few character traits Axis consistently has is his raving hypocrisy.
It hasn't even gotten half as blatant as it's going to become.
Yup. That is if they didn't just die outright from the beatings they've sustained. Also why are they naked? The author has a really weird hang-up about random nudity.
I have far less restraint; in my own spork of this trilogy I went off on multiple expletive-laden rants and called him just about everything in the book. "Axis McDouchebag" was the mildest.
Axis is of course going to continue treating Belial like shit, and that's going to escalate too. A lot.
I suppose it would be redundant of me to say that this is only going to get a million times worse too. The bullshit "Axis is the greatest" carry-on in this book is mild by comparison.
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Two lines. Two lines?! If it was like multiple chapters, I could maybe see why someone would be reluctant to change all of that material. But there's no excuse for two(ish) lines. That's either laziness, or incompetence. ...maybe both.
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Depending on how much later the next chapters take place, I could kind of forgive him for that, considering he was just tortured, so unless he has incredibly fast healing powers, he'd probably be a little clumsy for a while after his captivity.
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If their roles are finished for a significant amount of time, then just come up with an excuse for them to fuck off for a while! It would be so much better than having them lurking in the background desperately clawing for a shred of relevancy.
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Yeah, I was afraid of that...
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In a different book, I would say that it might be for humiliation and demoralization; if you're going to starve and beat them, might as well strip them of their dignity while you're at it. Except...one of them is barely out of infancy, so she's not really old enough to understand the concept of 'dignity', and given Douglass's apparent fondness for characters being nekkid, I'm guessing this is her possible nudity kink flaring up.
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Your own sporking, you say? Might there be a way to read said sporking? I love reading different takes on the same material. No one reads a book the same way as everyone else, and those separate views can be incredibly interesting.
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Yeah...I think that goes without saying at this point. *heavy sigh* You know, I'm okay with a protagonist who starts off unlikable, and then grows into a truly good person over the course of the books, but based on what everyone's been saying, he's going to go the other way, and lose any likability he might have at the beginning.
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Depending on how much later the next chapters take place, I could kind of forgive him for that, considering he was just tortured, so unless he has incredibly fast healing powers, he'd probably be a little clumsy for a while after his captivity.
SCSF: It is about half a day after this, so I could see him be clumsy... but then again, he can run for several miles. I am quite sure it is just for drama, as he slips just before the Avarinheim.
Your own sporking, you say? Might there be a way to read said sporking? I love reading different takes on the same material. No one reads a book the same way as everyone else, and those separate views can be incredibly interesting.
Here it would be! And look here for the comments on the latter part of the StarMan sporking. And have this link for (part of) the first book of the next trilogy.
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Yeah, her sisters are so irrelevant it seriously would have been that easy to fix. Elder sister Annwin only appears in ONE SCENE, and all she does is yell at Axis for losing Faraday, then instantly change her tune when Axis pulls the stupid prophecy card. Then vanishes forever.
Funnily enough his own sorry state never comes up again
They ultimately do both: stick around for FAR too long being obnoxious and providing unfunny "comic relief", then suddenly decide to leave.
Especially so since a lot of it is focused on babies and children. Shra gets naked again later on for no reason
There surely is! I did the entire trilogy and part of the subsequent book which proved not to be worth it so I quit. Big thanks to Teres/Pangolin for archiving everything! https://antishurtugal-reborn.dreamwidth.org/306349.html#cutid1
I'm afraid so. In this book he's a bullying jerk, but by the end he's straight-up 100% a villain ten times worse than the actual villains. You would not believe just how vile the things he does to other people are.
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Okay, I know I use old-fashioned and outdated phrases, and that's because I read a lot of old books. I'm thinking I know how Douglass got all these outdated ideas.
... Douglass, 'Hee hee, watch the stupid superstitious peasants flail' isn't half so funny as you think it is.
Methinks Douglass has confused 'courtyard' and 'town square'. (Although the priest's house, more commonly called the rectory, can be attached to the church, and I imagine that's the norm.)
Uh, yeah no I don't think the sores are from dehydration.
... Just going to note that under Catholic theology their supposed inability to understand what's going on makes them less able to deserve such treatment. Not going to claim this was always followed, but that's why animals for example can't do evil. (Also, why is Axis so shocked when treating accused criminals that way was normal in the European Medieval Period? Sadly, he shouldn't consider this noteworthy.)
Your explanation would stand a good chance of being effective, yes.
Azhure, just because Axis thinks Ogden there isn't a very good Brother doesn't mean Ogden is not a Brother nor does it make him an ally. In fact, in this particular case you should run very far away.
Uh, WHY is explosive anger and violence being cited as a desirable attribute of your PRIESTS? Possibly even your SAINTS?
Yeah, oaths are potent things.
... Why were we told Shra looked attractive before we were told she sounds like she's DYING? Priorities much?
How does a sound become more intense-sounding without growing louder? I suppose it might take up more of your attention, but she should really say that if that's what she means.
Belial couldn't help but worry about Ceolmund, whom no one had seen since he'd run away from Axis. Yes, the Brothers Ogden and Veremund were certain he'd be fine and he was a grown man capable of looking after himself, but Belial would have been much happier if Axis had approved his request to send out a search party.
Honestly, what had the Brothers been thinking? Shouldn't they want to know if their friend had found warmth and shelter? If he'd hurt himself running in the dark? Why he'd run off in the first place?
Belial loosened his grip on his reins and unclenched his jaw. Getting angry at the Brothers wouldn't make them better friends, and neither would aggravating his mild headache.
... Were they friends?
Belial turned the thought over in his mind. Ceolmund clearly disliked the Brothers, so whatever friendship existed was solely that of the Brothers. And they didn't seem to-
Belial bit back a swear as his headache spiked.
Ogden and Veremund didn't seem to care about Ceolmund, so they couldn't really be friends.
The headache throbbed between Belial's temples, but he was no stranger to pain. They'd clearly met before, so that much was true, but why lie about being friends?
Although, when could they have met? Ogden had been at Silent Woman Keep for nearly forty years and Veremund had to been been there for at least that long, and yet Ceolmund looked to be maybe thirty-five. He could be forty, but even thirty-five was a stretch.
Belial's head felt like he'd caught a mace with it. He grit his teeth and kept going.
There was no way Ogden and Veremund could have befriended Ceolmund and be who they claimed to be. They had frequently talked over Ceolmund. They'd claimed Ceolmund was... unwell. They hadn't been concerned when he ran away during a cold night.
They were lying, and Ceolmund knew it.
Belial felt almost dizzy as his headache drained to nothing. He didn't yet know what those two were lying about, but now he knew to be on his guard.
He glanced up the road at Axis and the two imposters, and decided he'd wait on telling Axis until he had more proof.
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Methinks Douglass has confused 'courtyard' and 'town square'. (Although the priest's house, more commonly called the rectory, can be attached to the church, and I imagine that's the norm.)
SCSF: That was about what I thought myself. (I already wondered what to call this house, since I was sure myself it was near the church.)
... Just going to note that under Catholic theology their supposed inability to understand what's going on makes them less able to deserve such treatment. Not going to claim this was always followed, but that's why animals for example can't do evil. (Also, why is Axis so shocked when treating accused criminals that way was normal in the European Medieval Period? Sadly, he shouldn't consider this noteworthy.)
Yes, it is just such a silly reason. For the prisoners... I do not yet know if this is common practice in Achar, so I cannot say much on it.
Your explanation would stand a good chance of being effective, yes.
Why, thank you!
Uh, WHY is explosive anger and violence being cited as a desirable attribute of your PRIESTS? Possibly even your SAINTS?
It is especially bad when combined with the moralising over how the Avar are non-violent, so why would they like this?
How does a sound become more intense-sounding without growing louder? I suppose it might take up more of your attention, but she should really say that if that's what she means.
Noted!
Yes, go Belial!
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Explosive anger and violence are depicted as virtues in every other part of the "story", so...
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At least Newcomb is honest about it.
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Thank you! Belial has a hard road ahead, but I think he'll make it.
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SCSF: That would certainly fit well.
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Her attempts at comic relief are universally terrible. It's almost always either slapstick crap at someone's expense or a character making "witty" remarks which are instead just dumb and annoying.
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